Matt 7:17 In everything, treat others as you would want them to treat you, for this fulfills the law and the prophets.

Keys steps in being the Christian God wants you to be.

While a lot of people run after titles such as pastor, prophet, apostle, teacher, the perfume of a person is not in their title, but in their character.  “What a man builds with his gifts, he can just as quickly destroy by his character. 1″

1. Treat others as you would have have them treat you. It must be the motto in your life. This scripture holds the key to your whole walk in Christ. We must take it seriously and live it. If we judge ourselves by our intentions and other by their actions, we need to re-evaluate, re-program, re-set our thinking. In everything, treat others how we would like to be treated. But also go one step further. Manage your expectations, so that when someone does not treat you with respect or love, it does not bring bitterness. Continue to treat others with kindness, love and compassion. If you hear something negative about a fellow Christian, either dismiss it, or if you have a concern,  go directly to the person who was gossiped about  to inquire rather than spread the gossip in the name of “praying for the person”. If the situation was reversed, you would appreciate someone coming directly to you.
2. Understand what you can and what you cannot do- you are limited. You are part of the Body of Christ and as A MEMBER- you have a part to play, a function, a contribution BUT you cannot do it all. Therefore, welcome others and see their potential to be what you cannot be and to do what you cannot do. A leader sees this in others and strives to cultivate and lift others up. It is not about your kingdom, your legacy or your ambition. It is about Christ and His Kingdom. Seek first His Kingdom and our lives will be better for it.  Put away the need to be in control and delegate to others who may excel in those areas that you don’t.
3. Learn to love others for who they are and what they can be. People are not your pet projects to turn into what you think is best for you and for your purposes. Too many times I have seen lives ruined because people with influence over others, try to tell them what should be and try to fit square pegs into round holes. Instead, see people as how God sees them- He loved each person so much that he died for that person. Each person was created in His image for His purpose- not yours. Look out for their interest and not yours no matter how attractive and practical your interests may appear. “Great leaders want others to supersede them. Insecure leaders can’t release the limelight. 1″
4. Don’t live in a bubble. Let others speak into your life. It is “ego” that says that you have it all. The Body of Christ is filled with people who can help build and encourage you. Seek them out. You may be gifted but your gifts come from God. Accept encouragement from others who may not have a title or a platform. God does not need a title or a platform to speak His words.
5. Always, your words pale in the shadow of your actions. So while your lips move and form words that seek to communicate one thing, your actions do more than words to either back up what you say or nullify it. So when you speak about love but your actions speak selfishness and disregard- you nullify your words and they become a waste of breathe and just air. The medium for transmission of words spoken on behalf of God must always be LOVE. So when you speak- speak carefully and make sure you back it up with ACTIONS. “Never forget: people will follow your bad traits more than your good ones. 1″
6. Stop the blame game. Why is it always someone else’s fault and not yours? We are quick to see fault in others and point out that the reason we cannot get to a certain point is because the other person stands in front of us. How sad when we can only see someone else’s negatives, rather than seeing our own shortcomings, lack of foresight and narrowness of thought. We need to own up to our mistakes, failures and lack of foresight. “Blaming others and guilt-tripping them is the mark of a poor leader. Good leaders acknowledge their mistakes and take responsibility. 1”
7. Promises, Promises, Promises- spoken in the heat of conversation but never fulfilled. We must be careful with our words. Don’t inflate our own egos and people’s opinions of us by promising what we cannot deliver. And even if we have good intentions, let our yes be yes and our no be no. If we cannot do it- say so. Better to surprise someone with a good deed rather than promise a good deed and fail to do it. One brings gratitude- the other brings disappointment, resentment and erosion of trust and respect.
8. Relationships are important and we must seek to mend relationships, build bridges and fences. Sometimes that entails humbling ourselves, even when it is not entirely our fault. Taking the high road and not allowing ourselves to dwell in the pits of self pity, blame and resentment is a mark of a servant of God. It certainly takes a lot to admit a mistake but it takes even more to step back  and apologize when the mistake is not ours. Always count the cost and put others first.
9. Everyone wants to lead and no-one wants to serve. So if all we have is a bunch of leaders and no servants, the house soon becomes chaotic. But the mark of a leader is first the heart of a servant. Put aside the need for control, the outward show of washing of feet and let us follow the Master.  Become excellent at actually serving rather than talking about serving and seeking to be the one in control.

Phil 2: 1-11 Therefore, if there is any encouragement in Christ, any comfort provided by love, any fellowship in the Spirit, any affection or mercy, complete my joy and be of the same mind, by having the same love, being united in spirit, and having one purpose. Instead of being motivated by selfish ambition or vanity, each of you should, in humility, be moved to treat one another as more important than yourself. Each of you should be concerned not only about your own interests, but about the interests of others as well. You should have the same attitude toward one another that Christ Jesus had, who though he existed in the form of God did not regard equality with God as something to be grasped, but emptied himself by taking on the form of a slave, by looking like other men, and by sharing in human nature. He humbled himself, by becoming obedient to the point of death – even death on a cross! As a result God exalted him and gave him the name that is above every name, so that at the name of Jesus every knee will bow – in heaven and on earth and under the earth – and every tongue confess that Jesus Christ is Lord to the glory of God the Father.

1. Frank Viola